I hope you are well today! Today, I am continuing the conversation we started last week concerning healing family wounds. This time of the year we get together with family and friends more and I want us to have the BEST time we can with those we love. In order to make that happen, please be sure to look at these final three areas.

UNSPOKEN EXPECTATIONS: Whenever you’ve taken the time to expect something of someone or from someone, WITHOUT making your expectations clear, you are setting yourself (and the relationship) up for disaster. Be careful to clearly state what you expect or desire from those you love. Unspoken expectations (I thought we’d visit my family this holiday…I thought you’d be home early for dinner…I didn’t know you were going out again, etc.) get you into trouble and severely hurt relationships.

Family growth tip: say what you mean, mean what you say; don’t have expectations of family members without their knowledge.

NEGATIVITY: Enough said, right? Hostility, withdrawal and pessimism are some of the hallmarks of negativity and negative people. DON’T participate in the negative role. These characteristics hinder and oppose constructive family connection.

Family growth tip: don’t think, assume, or believe the worst—be optimistic and positive as best you can.

DRAMA: Every family has the drama kings and queens! Some people just LOVE to keep drama going. Drama of the negative kind, however, is not good for healthy family relationships. Do everyone a favor and politely ask the drama people to tone it down for the sake of the family. If they can’t or won’t, be selective in when you insert them into the family dynamic.

Family growth tip: avoid negative drama and unnecessary drama at all costs. Don’t keep—or allow—disagreements and drama going in your family.